Negotiating Tips – Ladies, Take A Hint From The Men And Don’t Settle

Here are some great negotiating tips: Ladies, take a lesson from the NFL. Don’t settle for what you don’t want.

Day 86 of the NFL lockout, and no sign of settlement. Guys are hanging out, practicing unofficially, or seeking attention doing crazy things. But the suspense continues. Are men better than women at not giving in? My observations over the years has me thinking “yes.” I teach negotiation to women as well as to men, and women have this thing about “getting it over with,” “might as well,” “don’t want to dwell on the negative.”

Well, I have this thing about getting what you want, hanging tough till you do, using some “necessary roughness” on the opponent by making him sweat it out. The one who can “blow your internal whistle,” and stop the action, and hang out in the waiting period has the advantage, as far as I can tell.

I constantly preach patience (one of my lessons, too) especially to women. It’s okay to be uncomfortable for a while, if it can lead to getting a desired result. And that’s what these NFL owners and players are doing: being uncomfortable, waiting for the other side to give in first. Nobody wants to miss a season, and their share of a $9 billion industry, but crunch time isn’t really till July.

Ladies, let’s take a lesson from this: don’t SETTLE, just because we were socialized to answer when spoken to—the most powerful sentence I teach is “Let me get back to you on that.” Blow your internal whistle; stop the action; regroup, and GO for what you want.


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